I get the grandkids to gobble their greens by timing them like it's a race at the Dinner Games

Old tricks remain the best ‘uns for cajoling grandkids into gobbling their greens.

Back in the day I deployed an armoury to coax my three children into eating everything from asparagus to sprouts.

Bribery was handy, promises of ice cream chocolate tasty incentive to eat dinner. Threatening TV bans sullenly improved appetites momentarily but the blighters knew enforcement hurt me more than them.

Emotional blackmail had long before hit the wall, kids unmoved by protestations that starving children in poorer parts of the world would love the cabbage. Cheeky retorts about posting it to them were guilt nudges to send Oxfam a donation.

Most effective when they were young was introducing a challenge: pretending food is an aeroplane, humming engine noises while flying a spoon before landing into a gaping mouth, worked a treat with toddlers.

I just about still get away playing the game with Canny C but now she’s turned two my granddaughter appears to be humouring me. And then only briefly, turning her head away and uttering an immovable “No” with accelerating haste.

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She may be ready for an approach still going down a treat with her elder brother, Little L. At the grand age of four he relishes a challenge, any challenge.

Timing a run to a tree in the park to tire him has the fella giving as much as USA’s Noah Lyles winning 100m Olympic Gold. Encouraged by declaring each attempt equal or a teeny bit faster than the last the exertion guarantees knackered Little L’s parents an uninterrupted night’s kip.

So this Wednesday cunning granda deployed the technique to talk him into eating all his broccoli after a triumph last week with green beans. To be fair, he usually likes his veg. Which is fortunate. Little L is a self-declared vegetarian, shunning meat leaving plants his main fuel.

Tired from school, he might have scoffed the broc anyway but I like a challenge too. Mine was to ensure Little L had every single piece. He did. I won.

Little L bit immediately hearing the suggestion each stem’s consumption be timed. Happy I was silently counting assisted the great countdown deception with guessed rather than actual figures.

One day in the future Little L might be urged by a doctor to eat slower and chew 32 times before swallowing each mouthful to avoid indigestion. He may have cause to curse granda’s dinner game if he should.

Until then I’ll celebrate a small green success.